The State of my Heart

On Sunday, November 3rd, I had a massive heart attack. As they were working on me, it was clear that it was questionable if I was going to live. My heart stopped twice before I was airlifted to a hospital with a Cath Lab. I boarded the helicopter not knowing if I would see my wife and kids in life again.

On the whole helicopter ride I did not close my eyes for fear of not opening them again. I made sure that the paramedic knew to tell my wife and kids that I love them. My thoughts on that ride were chaotic but I tried to find peace. The pilot opened the window so I could get air, and I thought about how dieing with fresh air blowing on my face might not be so bad. After 30 minutes we made it to the hospital.

I was immediately rushed to the Cath lab and got a stint placed. It provided relief and the doctor was positive about my prognosis. I was wheeled to the ICU where I finally got to see my wife. She had to drive over an hour to the hospital not knowing if I made it.

After an hour seeing my wife, the chest pains began again. The stint had collapsed. Turns out I was one of the rate people who the common blood thinners do know work. Again, I was rushed to the Cath lab and a stint was placed again. This time it took.

I did not sleep that night or most of the next day due to fear of closing my eyes. It did not help that my chest wall was blistered due to the shocking used to restart my heart.

All told this “adventure” lasted approximately 12 hours. I believe strongly that the ramifications of the heart attack will linger for the rest of my life. My only risk factor is high cholesterol, which was diagnosed Monday. My diet will be one of the major changes. Another will have to be stress.

Even as I write about managing stress, I am struggling to go to sleep because I just feel off. I going to have issues with my stress. I am never off. I am always working on something. I need to find the strength and wisdom to change.